michael moore Revisited

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Last year, it came out that old fatty was trying to get letters from military people... for his new movie, you know. Apparently, he is planning a scandalous expose on how the military is actually full of far left communists, socialists, and- above all- Bush haters!

Anway, when I heard that his royal fatness was actually soliciting letters, I jumped at the chance to comply. Oddly enough, I never received a reply... go figure.

With old fatty-pants being somewhat back in the news- what with him sponsering Cindy Sheehan and all- I thought it would be fun to take another look at this.

Soooo... here is my letter to michael moore... dusted off and ready for another day in the sun.

Mr. moore,

I was recently informed via a great website (www.imao.us) that you were seeking letters from veterans and military members.

As a good Marine, my first reaction was, of course, to sit down and write you a long, detailed letter, outlining exactly what I thought of you and your unspeakably vile anti-American actions... and the fact that you have, without question, aided our enemy and thereby caused additional and unnecessary American casualties... and the fact that calling you a "cancer" on our country would be an insult to cancer itself... and the fact that you have been a large part (no pun intended) of our societal decay.

That was my first reaction. Then I thought of that beautiful day (November 2nd, 2004), and how I should, instead, thank you. Due in large part (again, no pun intended) to your laughable lie-umentary and your pathetic, chomsky-wannabee speeches and stunts, the American people woke up from their stupor and resoundingly re-elected our superb Commander-in-Chief.

Finally, I realized that I needn't bother at all. The best cure for your evil ridiculousness was just a good dose of overexposure to it. Now, just like john kerry, you are relegated to the trash heap of history- along with a sizable portion (still no pun intended) of your fellow socialist/communist liberals. Seeing your sycophantic hosts worship you at the democrat convention told us all we need to know about that party.

In the end, then, no letters are necessary. You have become monumentally, enormously (pun intended), hugely (pun intended) irrelevant. You simply do not matter anymore.

Take heart, though, I will always remember you as a filthy traitor and an enemy to the United States of America. Hope that helps.

Sincerely,

Kurt G.

P.S. My son is also a Marine, currently serving in Fallujah. I'd like to send along a big "F-YOU" from him and his fellow heroes.

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